Sticking My Tongue Out at Anxiety: Embracing My Inner Child
Do you ever feel trapped in cycles of anxiety, overthinking, or self-doubt? You’re not alone. I sometimes catch myself sticking my tongue out when I’m concentrating, a tiny habit from childhood. It doesn’t define me, but it’s a small glimpse of my inner child still present, quietly shaping how I experience the world. Many of us carry habits and emotional patterns from childhood, ways of thinking, feeling, and reacting, that continue to influence how we navigate life today. Recgonising these patterns—yes, even the tiny, silly ones—is the first step toward feeling calmer, more grounded, and more in control.
Where Anxiety Comes From
Anxiety rarely appears out of nowhere. It often grows from early experiences, moments when we felt unseen, unheard, or uncertain. Even small experiences can leave lasting imprints. You might notice that you:
Overthink situations or decisions,
Struggle to express your needs or set boundaries,
Feel “too much” or “not enough” even as an adult.
Recognising these patterns in yourself is the first step toward change, and once you see them, you can start responding consciously rather than reacting automatically. Sometimes it’s just noticing the small twitch in your fingers or the little sigh you let out—it all matters.
Why Childhood Patterns Matter
Our early years teach us how to cope and how to relate to others. If a child grows up with criticism, unpredictability, or emotional neglect, the nervous system can stay on high alert well into adulthood. This can show up as anxiety, perfectionism, or difficulty trusting yourself and others.
Understanding these patterns isn’t about blaming the past, it’s about giving yourself compassion and insight. By noticing how childhood experiences influence your thoughts and reactions, you can begin to make conscious choices that feel safer and more nurturing.
Practical Ways to Start Shifting Patterns
Even outside therapy, you can begin noticing and shifting old patterns. Here are some ways to start:
Mindfulness and Reflection
Pause to notice your thoughts and feelings without judgment. Questions like, “What am I feeling right now, and why?” can help uncover hidden triggers. Just a few seconds of awareness can already make a difference—trust me.Journaling
Writing down your thoughts can highlight recurring patterns and beliefs that feed anxiety. Don’t worry about spelling or grammar, just let it flow.Self-Compassion
Speak to yourself as you would to a child you care for. I sometimes find myself doodling little shapes or tapping my fingers when I’m anxious, a small quirk from childhood. Noticing it with kindness—rather than thinking “ugh, really?”—can make a big difference.Small, Achievable Steps
Change happens gradually. Start with simple actions, a mindful walk, a short breathing exercise, or gently asserting your needs in a low-stakes situation. Even tiny wins count—they add up faster than you think.
You Are Not Alone
Many people feel like they’re “too sensitive” or “overreacting,” but anxiety often reflects deeply rooted responses developed in childhood. These feelings are valid, and change is possible. Noticing your inner child, those little habits, tics, or playful quirks, can help you reconnect with curiosity, resilience, and joy.
Even small moments of awareness or reflection are meaningful steps toward feeling calmer and more confident.
A Gentle Closing
If you feel ready to explore these patterns further, reaching out for support, through therapy or a trusted friend, can be a helpful next step. You don’t have to navigate these challenges alone.
I’ll finish this blog with a small smile, sticking my tongue out just like I do when I’m concentrating, and loving my inner child for all the ways it still shows up. Yep, even the little fidgets and doodles count. It’s a little reminder that we can embrace ourselves, quirks and all, and that joy and curiosity are never too far away.
Wishing you good mental health in the meantime